Boleyn Ambition

While watching The Other Boleyn Girl, I couldn’t help but think of the greatest Bree Van De Kamp quote:

“When I was young, my stepmother told me that I was very lucky.

“I possessed beauty, wit, cunning, and insight.

“These were weapons all women needed to survive in the world.”

The Other Boleyn Girl tells the story of Anne (Natalie Portman) and Mary Boleyn (Scarlett Johansson) – sisters driven by their beyond ambitious father and uncle to advance their family's status by courting the affections of King Henry Tudor (Eric Bana).

“Traded like cattle,” is more like it, as their mother (Kristin Scott Thomas) would say.

Only Anne possesses all of the characteristics described by the Desperate Housewives character, however, and this, of course, creates conflict and drama and distance between her and her sister.

Leaving behind the simplicity of country life, the girls are thrust into the dangerous and seducing and thrilling world of court life.

What began as a bid to help their family develops into a contest between the two for the love of the king – they are sisters, and therefore born to be rivals. While one is driven by ambition, the other is driven by true affection, though.

In the end, after the two have outwitted, outsmarted, and outplayed each other, they (and England) will be torn apart – natch. Remember: Ambition pays off if it’s coupled with kindness, kids. Now play nice.

The Other Boleyn Girl is at its wicked best when Portman is on screen.

She shines as the conniving and fearless Anne, and easily outshines Johansson’s “fairer” Mary.

This movie is a beguiling soap-operatic version of 16th century England, and thus should not be taken as a history lesson.

You will have a grand ol’ time if you think of it as entertainment…and then open an encyclopedia.

My Rating ***

Photo: Columbia Pictures.

Huh?

Last night’s episode of Lost – a show I clearly just heart – the Desmond-centric “The Constant,” has got to be the trippiest one yet.

There was time traveling, questions of consciousness (both past and present), and even a near-death experience that wasn’t thanks to love (Henry Ian Cusick and Sonya Walger, you guys are good).

In the end, I was left so…confused.

And, mind you, I loved it.

Photo: ABC.com.

Raising the Musical Bar

May’s going to be a fun, sexy time.

Madonna’s Hard Candy will have just hit the stores, the Sex and the City movie will open on the 30th, and, at some point, Coldplay will release their fourth album.

Rolling Stone was recently invited to preview the band’s work in progress, and here’s some of what they magazine had to say about it:

“Several tracks are considerably rougher around the edges, with distorted guitars and more prominent percussion.

“The lyrics are darker, dealing with recurring themes of death and loneliness.

“And on several songs, [lead singer Chris] Martin extends his vocal palette considerably beyond the falsetto that has largely defined him, exhibiting a lower, sexier mode that feels more personal and real.”

Guitarist Johnny Buckland says the band “felt like the first three albums were a trilogy, and we finished that. So we wanted to do something different.”

Click here to find out what Rolling Stone had to say about the songs they were allowed to listen.

I’m already a big fan of “Violet Hill,” if anything because it features the lyric, “If you love me, won’t you let me know?”

Swoon.

Photo: Clipov.net.

Heading for the Hills

It was only a matter of time: I may have to start watching MTV’s The Hills.

The network has released an extended and dramatic trailer to promote the March 24 return of the third season of its “reality” show – and I’m strangely compelled by it.

It’s probably just me “being Miley” over the first and one time I watched it last December, but I just may have to add The Hills to my list of programs to record (on repeat, natch).

Photo: AOLCDN.com.

And You Can Bite on It, For Inspiration

Madonna’s upcoming album has an official title, and it is…Hard Candy.

The record, which includes the previously leaked (and renamed) “Candy Store,” will be released on April 29.

Madonna, her longtime rep Liz Rosenberg told EW.com exclusively, chose to stick with the sweet theme because, “she loves candy.”

I bet she does.

“[Hard Candy]’s about the juxtaposition of tough and sweetness, or as Madonna so eloquently expressed, ‘I’m gonna kick your ass, but it’s going to make you feel good.’”

The first single, the also renamed “4 Minutes,” featuring Justin Timberlake (and Timbaland), will be out at the end of March.

They totally should perform it at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction ceremony on March 10.

Photo: RareRecords.com.au.

Never Give Up on the Good Times

The Spice Girls wrapped their successful reunion tour Tuesday in Toronto yesterday.

Summing up the experience on their blog, the quintet wrote: “Our time is up...we’ve come to the end of the road...there are tears of both sadness and joy. Look how far we’ve come!

“We look to the future with hope and imagination and let Girl Power live on through all of you as it will continue in us and the future generations to come.”

Indeed.

Sorry, I missed you, gals. Next time? (Pretty please?)

Photo: TheSun.co.uk.

Madonna and JT Have a Date

Organizers confirmed today what I knew back in January: Madonna will be inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame on March 10 by Justin Timberlake.

Since that bit of gossip turned out to be true, I suppose I now can share what else I’ve heard.

At the time, I was told the Queen of Pop and the Prince of Pop were planning to perform at the show – presumably “4 Minutes to Save the World.”

The two would rise from underneath the stage, with Timberlake at the piano and Madonna on it.

As of last weekend, though, I heard that plan have been scrapped…but if anything of the sort happens, remember where you read it first.

Photo: PicasaWeb.com.

SJP, Get Your Clothes...Report Back to Broadway

Is Sarah Jessica Parker getting ready to go back to Broadway to play and Italian air hostess in Boeing Boeing when the comedy leaves the West End to cross the pond this spring?

That’s the word on the street today.

Parker would appear in the play starting in April…which leads me to believe this may not happen (although it very well may), since she probably will promote the Sex and the City movie (opening on May 30) with an extensive tour.

This would be a bit of a homecoming for the actress. She previously appeared in Annie as a young girl, as well as in How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying and in Once Upon a Mattress.

Photo: PhotoBucket.com.

What a Night

Last night’s 80th Annual Academy Awards, hosted by Jon Stewart, celebrated the best in film, blah, blah, blah.

We all know what happens. Here’s what really matters.

Daniel Day-Lewis capped a year of accolades for his turn in There Will Be Blood, picking up his second Best Actor Oscar. Ditto Javier Bardem, who picked up his first for his supporting work in No Country for Old Men.

Surprises came in the Best Actress and Best Supporting Actress categories when La Vie en Rose’s Marion Cotillard (pictured at right) and Tilda Swinton (Michael Clayton) pulled respective upsets over leading contenders Julie Christie (Away From Her) and Cate Blanchett (I’m Not There).

Another surprise? Hearing the word “cojones” come out of Helen Mirren’s mouth.

As expected, No Country for Old Men pulled a trifecta when it was announced the winner of the Best Adapted Screenplay, Best Director (for the Coen brothers), and Best Picture awards.

More importantly, the voters got it beyond right when they chose “Falling Slowly,” from Once, as the year’s Best Song.

Glen Hansard and Markéta Irglová performed the simply gorgeous song accompanied by Academy Awards conductor Bill Conti’s orchestra, leaving no question as to why they deserved to win.

And when the two finally took to the stage to accept their hardware, an excited Hansard urged everyone to “Make art! Make art!” in the cutest Irish accent, but Irglová wasn’t allowed to give thanks.

In what instantly became the night’s most gracious and unexpected moment, Stewart brought her back out so she could finally have a moment.

For a complete list of winners, click here.

And now on to the all-important fashion.

My pick for best dressed was Cotillard who dazzled in white Jean Paul Gaultier, followed by Cameron Diaz in pale pink Christian Dior, Keri Russell in champagne Nina Ricci, Heidi Klum in red John Galliano, and Jessica Alba in Marchesa.

Photo: MSNBC.MSN.com.

Jimmy Kimmel Has Made the Switch

“Don’t get mad. Get even.”

Whomever said that surely didn’t say it anticipating the age in which a comedian would tell her boyfriend she’s “f---ing Matt Damon!” on his own TV show, only to have him respond a few weeks later by telling her he’s, well…“f---ing Ben Affleck!”

That’s just what Jimmy Kimmel did on Jimmy Kimmel Live! last night, in response to girlfriend Sarah Silverman’s revelation that for the past five years she and Damon have been...doing it, “on the bed / on the floor / on a towel by the door / in the tub / in the car / up against the mini-bar.”

Kimmel, knowing that he couldn’t just do a send-off of Silverman’s song, went all out, recruiting not only Damon’s BBF Affleck, but also Brad Pitt, Harrison Ford, Cameron Diaz, Christina Applegate, Don Cheadle, Macy Gray, Josh Groban, Huey Lewis, Joan Jett, Pete Wentz, and Robin Williams, among others.

The result was hilarious, and I’d say Silverman and Kimmel are pretty even now...although she has the edge since she told him off first.

Photo: People.com.

An Oscars Classic

So I’m really looking forward to tomorrow’s performance of “Falling Slowly,” from Once, at the Oscars, but…

Can any Best Song performance ever top Madonna’s 1991 Academy Award-winning performance of “Sooner or Later,” from Dick Tracy, in pizzazz alone?

As if. I don’t think so.

Photo: Madonnalicious.com.

I’m Sorry But It’s Just Too Good!

The full-length trailer for the Sex and the City movie hit the Internet today – but all the sites that posted it had to take it down per studio’s claim.

So the news at first was good, then not that good…then good again.

I love the Google.

I found a site that still has it, and the movie looks good. Check it out, already.

The filmmakers have reinvented the HBO comedy and turned it into a true dramedy – and I likey.

The trailer shows us that some things end (say it isn’t so, Steve!), some things begin (congratulations, Charlotte!), and some things…never change (Carrie and Co. are back!).

If this isn’t a red herring, then May 30 can’t get here fast enough.

Photo: New Line Cinema.

Update: The trailer has been officially released.

Do You Only See What Your Eyes Want to See?

This is what you need to know about Vantage Point.

It’s a perfectly beautiful morning in Salamanca, Spain.

Hundreds of people have gathered to listen to the president of the United States deliver a speech, when, before he can greet his audience, he’s shot down.

Got that? OK….

This is what you need to know about Vantage Point.

It’s a perfectly beautiful morning in….

You see, there are eight strangers in the plaza where the POTUS was to speak, each with a different vantage point…each with a very different piece of the puzzle that will help Secret Service agents Thomas Barnes (Dennis Quaid) and Kent Taylor (Matthew Fox) figure out who is behind this assassination.

The problem is by the time the third, not to mention fourth and fifth “This is what you need to know about Vantage Point. It’s a perfectly beautiful morning in….” rolls, you might feel a bit fatigued.

Taking a cue from Fox’s TV show Lost, the movie begins playing this pivotal scene from the perspective of a news crew that includes Zoë Saldana and Sigourney Weaver, only to go back and play it again from the agents’, then again from that of an American tourist (Forest Whitaker), and then twice again.

Each time, though, you might find yourself hoping the filmmakers had, oh, I don’t know, streamlined this scene to get to the good part faster.

This is not to say Vantage Point is worthless. It’s a perfectly fine late-winter thriller that features a really cool car chase. It’s like the board game Clue, except in this case, if you’re smart, you’ll have figured out who’s the bad guy by the 45-minute mark. And this is a 90-minute movie.

My Rating **1/2

Photo: Columbia Pictures.

The Plot Thickens Yet Again

Last night’s episode of Lost, titled “Eggtown,” was a Kate-centric installment – so I really enjoyed it.

It had me at the edge of my…bed.

Featuring a shirtless-in-multiple-scenes Josh Holloway – H.O.T. (and that’s selling it short) – and more plot twists and turns and revelations than expected, which had me really invested in the future of one of my favorite castaways, is it any wonder it did?

And, best of all, it was all about Evangeline Lilly, whom you know I think is the best thing to happen to TV since Jennifer Garner and Keri Russell.

Photo: ABC.com.

Behave Now…

Senators Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton, the leading Democratic presidential candidates, will face off in a live debate in Texas tonight.

I’m still going to watch the Kate-centric episode of Lost instead – I know, priorities much? – but this is a throw-down that really makes me wish I could vote in the United States.

Photo: TimesOnline.com.

When Denzel Met Russell (Again)

American Gangster is out on DVD today – and I can’t wait to go home and watch this film, one of the most celebrated of last year.

Denzel Washington plays a real-life drug lord who smuggled heroin into Harlem during the 1970s by hiding the stash inside the coffins of American soldiers returning from Vietnam.

Russell Crowe plays the detective who brings him to justice.

The two Oscar winners have shared the big screen before – in 1995’s Virtuosity – but this, I understand, is the first time they’ve truly ignited it together.

Plus, I’m dying to be blown away by Ruby Dee’s Academy Award-nominated performance.

Photo: Universal Pictures.

L2 Does M2

Lindsay Lohan – who had better not fallen off the wagon like some reports say – has recreated Marilyn Monroe’s legendary 1962 final photo shoot for Bert Stern (with the veteran photographer himself) for the spring fashion issue of New York magazine.

L2 appears nude and between the sheets in the photos, just like M2, and admits she was “comfortable with it.”

Alrighty.

Photo: People.com.

Filth and Wisdom and Whole Lot of…

Fill in the blank after you’ve watched this clip of Madonna’s directorial debut.

Photo: MadonnaTribe.com.

The Best Valentine’s Day Present

Forget heart-shaped chocolates (did I really write that?). It was all about a new episode of Lost for me last night.

“The Economist,” a Sayid-centric installment, didn’t offer many answers, but it also didn’t raise too many questions.

It quietly advanced the story – and put us a week away from a Kate-centric episode, for which I simply cannot wait because I simply live for Evangeline Lilly.

This week was about Sayid, though, and Naveen Andrews did a really good job of balancing the many nuances of his character’s flash-forward self.

It was the last scene’s reveal that *e* makes it off the Island as well (as part of the “Oceanic Six”?) that really upped the episodes ante, though.

What? How? Why is Sayid working for him, and who is this economist he must kill?

I guess this episode really did raise more questions than I thought.

Photo: ABC.com.

Amy Adams Has a Date with Oscar

Although she didn’t score a nomination for her delightful work in Enchanted, Amy Adams (pictured at right) has been invited to this year’s Academy Awards as a performer.

Adams (a past Best Supporting Actress nominee for Junebug) will sing “Happy Working Song,” one of the movie’s three ditties up for an Oscar in the Best Original Song category.

(I love Adams and enjoyed Enchanted, but I feel this particular award should go to Once.)

Also scheduled to attend and present at the ceremony are last year’s winners, Forest Whitaker, Helen Mirren, and Jennifer Hudson, as well as George Clooney, Cameron Diaz, Harrison Ford, Nicole Kidman, Tom Hanks, Martin Scorsese, and Denzel Washington, among others.

Oh, and Miley Cyrus will be there, too.

No disrespect to the pop phenom, but has she even been in a movie? Her invitation reeks of ratings-hungry ploy.

I know she’s had her troubles, mostly self-brought, but an invitation to Lindsay Lohan would hold more water.

I’m just sayin’.

Photo: Telegraph.co.uk.

Nostalgia, Pt. 18

This one is for all the Lukes of the world, wishing you joy and happiness.

Boy, do I really miss Gilmore Girls sometimes.

Lauren Graham was and continues to be my karaoke hero.

Photo: CelebrityCouples.net.

Indiana Jones Can Leave His Hat On

The trailer for the oh-so-hotly anticipated Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull is out, and it does what it’s supposed to do and more.

This is what is known of the plot: Indiana Jones is thrust back in action, venturing into the jungles of South America in a race against Soviet agents to find the mystical Crystal Skull.

Opening on May 22, this fourth chapter of the saga stars Harrison Ford, natch, and features Karen Allen, Cate Blanchett (in a black wig), and Shia LaBeouf.

Photo: Paramount Pictures.

Hollywood Beware: Another Strike Could Hit Ya

Variety reports that A-List stars Meryl Streep, Tom Hanks, Robert De Niro, and George Clooney have banded together to urge the Screen Actors Guild to begin its contract negotiations with Hollywood producers quickly, and thus avoid another strike that would further hold up development on movie projects.

Oy with the striking already.

The influential Oscar winners aren’t usually involved in SAG politics but are speaking out now in the wake of the just-concluded 100-day strike by the Writers Guild of America, which SAG strongly supported.

Studios have put feature development on hold until SAG signs a new deal.

The SAG contract expires on June 30, but talks have not been scheduled yet.

SAG, do as Clooney says and then join him for a drink. (Doesn’t he look charmingly lonely at right?)

Photo: TheHollywoodNews.com.

Just Because, Pt. 12

After a long morning drive set to love song after love song, “I want it painted black.”

That’s what happens when you’re not beaming anymore.

Photo: ForgottenJournal.com.

Madonna Does Berlin – and Berlin Likes It

Madonna premiered her directorial debut, Filth and Wisdom, at the Berlin Film Festival today, and the first review has been kind.

The Times gave the film 3 out of 5 stars, and suggests it’s a good starting point for the Queen of Pop’s career as a director.

“Despite its many shortcomings and an ending so mushy and neat it would embarrass Richard Curtis,” the paper says, “Madonna has done herself proud.

“Her film has an artistic ambition [duh!] that has simply bypassed her husband, the film director Guy Ritchie. She captures that wonderfully accidental nature of luck when people’s lives intersect for a whole swathe of unlikely but cherishable reasons.

“Altmanesque would be stretching the compliment too far, but Filth and Wisdom shows Madonna has real potential as a film director.”

I can’t wait to see it. Can you? (Don’t you lie now.)

Photo: People.com.

Update: For every kind review, there must be a harsh one: The Guardian has given 1 star to the 81-minute movie.

“Madonna has been a terrible actor in many, many films and now,” the paper says, “fiercely aspirational as ever, she has graduated to being a terrible director.”

Ouch.

Frak it...I still want to see it.

Strike No More

The writers strike is so over, we need a new word for over.

Yesterday, Writers Guild of America members voted by 92.5 percent to finally lift the strike order that was enacted on Nov. 5.

Production will resume on many TV shows quite soon – writers are expected back in the office today – and more new episodes will air in April and May.

Photo: EvilBeetGossip.film.com.

A Little Late Grammy Talk

The 50th Annual Grammy Awards were held on Sunday night, and although British singer Amy Winehouse (pictured at right) wasn’t in the house, she definitely was in the house.

Winehouse was the night’s big winner, taking home, among others, record of the year, song of the year, and best new artist awards.

Herbie Hancock took home the hardware for Album of the Year for River: The Joni Letters.

But as I mentioned, and as everyone knows, the night belonged to Winehouse, who didn’t so much as take home the gold as much as she actually will have it shipped home.

Because of her well-chronicled troubles, she was unable to attend the ceremony in Los Angeles, but performed two songs live-via-satellite from London, “You Know I’m No Good” and a very tongue-in-cheek version of “Rehab.”

It was by far the best show I’ve seen Winehouse put on – she appeared clear and present and not in danger – even though I hated the way it was promoted.

I don’t necessarily agree with Natalie Cole that the kudos were undeserved, but I see her point when she says, “We have to stop rewarding bad behavior.”

The Grammy Awards aren’t about the artists’ personal lives, but about the art. “We” must stop taking advantage of the situations these artists get into in the name of the mighty dollar (or is it the mighty Euro now?).

Anyway, highlights of the night included a fantastic performance by Tina Turner and Beyoncé, and a beau-ti-ful rendition of “No One” by Alicia Keys with John Mayer.

Also making me happy: Madonna winning a Best Long Form Music Video Grammy for “The Confessions Tour.”

Not making me happy, though: The fact that she wasn’t at the party. Hello! She, too, is turning 50 this year.

Photo: People.com.

Old Men Poised for Oscar Sweep?

With the Academy Awards forecast looking clear as the writers strike is resolved, the Coen brothers had better dust off their tuxes.

Their No Country for Old Men already has won Producers Guild, Directors Guild, and Writers Guild awards – all good indicators that the siblings should go home with Oscar on Feb. 24.

Ah, but will Atonement get in the way of the gold? The film recently won top honors at the BAFTA Awards.

We shall wait and see, shan’t we?

Photo: Miramax Films (No Country for Old Men).

Writers, Start Your Laptops!

The three-month-old writers strike is all but over.

Hooray for Hollywood.

And here’s to better, obviously well-deserved compensation for the writers – clearly the blood that runs through the veins of the TV and film industries.

Photo: EW.com.

Poster. Cool Poster

The poster for Quantum of Solace, the new James Bond movie, has been revealed.

It’s pretty cool, but it’d be hot if it featured the movie’s best asset: Daniel Craig.

What a tease, indeed.

Photo: EW.com.

Joshua Jackson’s on the Fringe

Former Dawson’s Creek scene-stealer Joshua Jackson, who was due to guest star on TV’s Grey’s Anatomy pre-writers strike, has joined the cast of J.J. Abrams’ Fringe pilot.

This show just got a lot more must-watch-y.

Welcome back, Pacey!

Photo: WireImage.com.

Don’t Mess with Oscar

For the past 10 days, the good word in and around Hollywood has been that the writers strike will end soon – as soon as this weekend, in fact.

Last night, former Walt Disney CEO Michael Eisner said on CNBC’s Fast Money that the three-month-old strike “is over,” indeed.

“[The Writers Guild of America and the Alliance of Motion Pictures & Television Producers] made the deal; they shook hands on the deal,” he said. “[The deal]’s going on Saturday to the writers in general.... They’ll be back to work very soon.”

That’s good and all – today just might be the last day of picketing! – and it just goes to show everyone that the most powerful man in town is a little golden fellow named Oscar.

The future of Feb. 24’s 80th Annual Academy Awards was in jeopardy, but it seems that isn’t the case anymore. The show will go on.

As to what this means for TV shows like Grey’s Anatomy and Heroes and Lost and their current seasons, well…get on the Google and find out.

I know the first may deliver a handful more episodes, the second will move right into production on their third season, and the third – fingers crossed – just might be able to produce its originally intended 16-episode season four commitment.

Photo: iVillage.com.

Update: My, look-see here if I didn’t go and found out if and when our stories will return to the tube.

My Invitation Must Have Gotten Lost in the Mail

Madonna and Gucci hosted a star-studded affair at the United Nations last night to raise $3.7 million for Raising Malawi and UNICEF.

Power couples Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher, and Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony were there.

So were, among others, Gwyneth Paltrow, Rosie O’Donnell, Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale, Drew Barrymore and Justin Long, Salma Hayek, Amy Adams, Heidi Klum, Diddy, Ellen Pompeo, Becki Newton (TV’s Ugly Betty), Ali Larter (TV’s Heroes), and Alicia Keys, Timbaland, and Rihanna, who performed for the Queen of Pop and her guests.

The point of this post?

No point. It is but an excuse to write about Madonna because face it…she’s Madonna.

Photo: People.com.

Update: Another report says the evening raised $5.5 million. Either way, that’s a lot of cake.

Lusting for Lost

How awesome was last week’s fourth season premiere of TV’s Lost?

I loved it so much I’m frakkin’ lusting for more, so it’s a good thing tonight brings a brand new installment titled “Confirmed Dead.”

Gasp.

Firstly, though, last week’s Hurley-centric episode, aptly titled “The Beginning of the End,” meant the show was back (in more ways than one). Jorge Garcia, who plays Hurley, was just outstanding. Almost immediately, the show had us wondering: Just who are the “Oceanic Six”?

Secondly, having Lost back also meant I could sit back and enjoy the ride. There’s a clear path toward the end of the show (it is due to wrap up its mythology-heavy story in 2010). Questions will be answered because the creative team behind the show can map out how and when to do so at leisure.

That doesn’t me they won’t keep us guessing.

But I say we keep watching. New characters will be introduced tonight – and that can only spell drama.

And in the case of Lost, that’s a good, good thing.

Photo: EW.com.

No More Drama

One door closes and another one opens.

Well, don’t call me Sad Spice anymore. Mary J. Blige is coming to the rescue.

Jay-Z and MJB will kick off their “Heart of the City Tour” in Miami – no pesky scheduling conflicts anticipated – on March 22. H-O-T.

Yeah.... Come to me.

Photo: ViewImages.com.

Smiling at Success

Well, call me wrong.

Here I was, thinking the 22-year-old Californian singer-songwriter of “Bubbly,” Colbie Caillat, was going to be a one hit wonder, when she up and releases “Realize,” which I really enjoy.

Choice lyrics:

“If you just realize /
What I just realized /
That we'd be perfect for each other /
And we'll never find another /
Just realize /
What I just realized /
We'd never have to wonder /
If we missed out on each other, now.”

Already then – obvious pulling of the strings. You gotta do what you gotta do for people to…uhh...realize they like you.

You go, C2.

Photo: ColbieCaillatMusic.com.

Bond Bound for Peru?

According to El Comercio, Peru’s leading newspaper, a team of 250 people working on the new James Bond movie, Quantum of Solace, are set to arrive in the South American country to shoot scenes in Cuzco early in March.

There’s no word on whether star Daniel Craig, or any of his co-stars, will be part of the journey, but rumor has it 007 gets married in this movie.

Back to Craig in Peru, though. A trip down south is sounding mighty tempting, after all.

Photo: Guardian.co.uk.

The Spice Girls Cancel – And So Do I

The Spice Girls will not be taking their reunion tour to South America, Asia, and Australia as previously planned, and for that they’re “very sorry.”

The quintet wanted their fans to dismiss the “lot of rubbish in the media” and “hear it from the horse’s mouth” – so they put together a video-message, which you can watch here.

They say they’re cutting the (already extended) tour short at the end of February due to personal and family commitments, and not because of in-fighting.

And to prove it, they even did a faux fighting bit that even made Posh crack a smile.

Too bad I won’t be able to see them, after all. I was going to fly up to New York to catch their concert on Feb. 11, but I have scheduling conflict.

I’m Sad Spice.

Humor – it really does come in handy….

Photo: DailyMail.co.uk.

Let’s Definitely Get Arrested

Jason Bateman confirmed to E! Online last week that the creators of the Emmy Award-winning comedy Arrested Development “have put the wheels in motion toward a major motion picture of the Fox TV comedy.”

This is like, the best week ever already.

“I can speak for the cast when I say our fingers are crossed,” Bateman said.

If this rumor turns out to be true, and a film does happen, and I get to see the glorious Jessica Walter on the big screen, all I could say to the creative minds behind the project (Mitch Hurwitz and Ron Howard) if given the chance is, “Marry me.”

Photo: MovieWeb.com.

Madonna, the Director

The synopsis for Madonna’s directorial debut has been published, along with the cast and crew list, by the Berlin Film Festival.

The Queen of Pop’s 81-minute film Filth and Wisdom will premiere at the festival on Feb. 13.

Attention American studios: Get it while it’s hot.

Photo: Madonnalicious.com.

Oh, David

Exactly four months after he nailed her to wall, David Letterman welcomed Paris Hilton back to his Late Show last Friday – and this time, the talk show host was very well-behaved.

Well…sorta.

This time around, Letterman kept the needling so subtle it went right over Hilton’s head.

Proving he’s a gentleman, he greeted the heir-head by acknowledging, “I offended you [the last time you were here]. I’m not here to make enemies, honestly. I’m terribly sorry.” He even offered her flowers.Proving she’s quite gullible, Hilton, who was on the show to promote her new movie, The Hottie and the Nottie (you should’ve heard the way Letterman pronounced it), accepted his apology, smiling back, “You better not try it again. I hope you got the jail thing out of your system.”

Oh, he did.

And whatever extra “thing” he had, he gave for sure.

Photo: TVGuide.com.

Part 2 Coming Through

Paramount Pictures has given director Matt Reeves a green light for a sequel to the love-it-or-hate-it hit Cloverfield.

And why wouldn’t it? The film grossed $46 million its first weekend out, and although grosses dropped semi-sharply the following weekend, a hit is a hit is a hit – and people want more.

Will this new film be a prequel, exploring how the film’s something came to be, or a sequel dealing with the aftermath of the first attack? Only time will tell….

I can’t wait to find out.

Photo: Paramount Pictures.

The Phantom Menace

Eva Longoria Parker told me last month that she was interested in starring in Over Her Dead Body because she loved the idea of playing a ghost.

“I thought it would be really fun,” she said. “When I read the script I thought [my character] was just fun.”

I cannot help but wonder if she was using the word “fun” loosely because this movie is anything but – it’s the opposite of it.

Longoria Parker plays Kate, a bridezilla who on her wedding date is crushed by the ice sculpture of an angel, leaving her fiancé Henry (Paul Rudd) behind.

One year later, he reluctantly agrees to consult a psychic/caterer (‘cause, you know, being a slash sort of girl makes her quirky and just what he needs) named Ashley (Lake Bell), and of course, he begins to fall for her.

But Kate, unable to move on, isn’t having any of this, and decides to haunt her until she forces her to break up with him.

To play Kate, Longoria Parker didn’t have to strain her acting muscles much. Ever seen TV’s Desperate Housewives? Kate’s Bree-meets-Gaby.

“I hadn’t thought of that, but I’d say Kate’s more like Bree than Gaby,” she said. “My biggest challenge was differentiating Gaby from Kate. Gaby is a little more self-absorbed and self-centered and materialistic, whereas Kate really thinks she’s doing the right thing to protect Henry. Her bitchiness is way more justified than Gaby’s ever will be.”

Alright – but what I want to know is what’s the excuse for wasting such great comedic chops in such a terrible movie?

I mean, for a romantic comedy Over Her Dead Body is neither nor. Its biggest laughs come halfway through…and there are fart sounds involved. Enough said.

The best things Over Her Dead Body’s got going for it are Longoria Parker’s gift for physical comedy, Rudd’s charm (which he loses along the way, as if he’s realizing this is no good), and the end…because it’s over.

Here’s to hoping Longoria Parker will get her dream project off the ground sometime soon, and that she’ll make up for this awful choice.

My Rating *1/2

Photo: New Line Cinema.

Wanna Laugh?

Sarah Silverman is a comic genius.

The gal I consider to be one of the funniest ones on in the entire planet came up with a creative, fun, and thoroughly Sarah Silverman way to celebrate her boyfriend Jimmy Kimmel’s five-year anniversary as an ABC late-night talk show host.

Silverman wrote him a very catchy song in which she confesses that for the past five years she’s been…“f---ing Matt Damon!”

The video is the funniest thing I’ve seen all week – and the funniest thing I’ll see next week, I’m sure.

Photo: C4TC.co.nz.

You Don’t Know Jack – And You Should

Twenty-three-year-old Jack Peñate’s debut album is called Matinee.

Remember that name and get to the nearest record store pronto.

This South Londoner’s sound is just fun – it’s pop and it’s rock and he says it also has soul. The point is it’s very fresh.

And with lyrics inspired by Jack Kerouac novels, like in “Spit at Stars,” his songs are not your run-of-the-mill compositions.

I likey.

Photo: NPR.org.